Atkins and Psychology...

[MellyG]

Wow, what a complex topic! I'm a therapist and have been involved in a number of conversations about the eating issues (both with clients about theirs and with friends about mine!) I think what Jane said about not thinking you can achieve success or that you deserve success can be a biggie for a lot of people. Having so much of your identity wrapped up in caring for others, as another member mentioned, can also be a big factor for some.

The big thing for me, though, is that feeling or "high" food can give you. Many junk foods trigger the release of natural opiate-like chemicals in the brain. It's like heroin!! For many people, this is the most effective method of relaxation and emotion regulation they have used. It's hard to give up the thing that's been most effective. Junk food is a very powerful emotion regulation tool and we need to have compassion for ourselves and the tough stuff we're trying to eat away!

If you've been doing Atkins and haven't learned non-binging/junk fooding ways of coping with your emotions, you are likely to "relapse," in my opinion. Were the times you have gone back to the non-Aktins woe particularly stressful ones? Did you feel better physically while on Atkins, but feel that tension or emotional pressure was building from not being able to get that food high? I know it's happened to me in the past.

There are a number of things you can practice in place of eating junk food when you feel that emotional pressure building. For some people, self-soothing with things like music, baths, breathing exercises, or special non-food treats can be really helpful. For others, sitting with those feelings and practicing some mindfulness can help them work through the feelings instead of pushing them away (if the thought of sitting with your feelings sounds scary, this may be something that is especially key for you). A lot of people need something that is physiologically jarring at those times that they feel like running to junk food. Things such as taking a cold shower, holding an ice cube, sprinting, or dipping your face in ice water can literally tip your body chemistry enough to turn down the intensity of the emotion so it is more bearable. Finally, you should alter your environment if you can by removing trigger foods, practicing assertiveness in difficult relationships, planning time in your day for cooking or exercising, etc, etc, to both reduce your stress and increase your chances of success.

There are SO many factors and so many things that can be helpful!!!!!

Hang in there everyone!

[Slidesdownmountains]

Erika and Melinda - thanks for your posts! very interesting about the opiate-like chemicals, because you do hear people saying that they feel food is a drug a lot of the time, and this ties in with the feeling of being addicted.

Melinda - what kind of therapy do you practice? Do you practice these sorts of techniques yourself?

I find that I buckle most in situations where I am in a bad mood, stressed, tired or out of a routine, especially when on holiday (for instance, I went to Italy for a friend's wedding and [admittedly though I didn't try VERY hard], there were not a massive amount of places to eat, and they were all very typically italian fare: bread, pasta, pizza, pudding... there's only so much antipasta, olives and mozzarella you can eat in one day (nitrates and cheese limits notwithstanding!) and so I have crashed and burned since then and am finding it very hard to get back on track. Often, I will write off a whole week saying I will start next Monday or something, but then fail to do so. Am still exercising but can definitely feel my weight gain slowing me down and a little tightness in the clothes - need to get a grip on myself: don't like feeling so guilty and unfit!

What advice do you have for work place eating scenarios (for instance, the almost constant stream of birthdays in the office apparently demand a stream of krispy kremes, Paul's cakes, Mark & Spencers goodies and Pringles....! I can smell them!!! I certainly can't take a bath, and I hate feeling like I'm being un-friendly for someone's birthday, but haven't quite come up with a satisfactory answer if I want to refuse some confectionary!

Also, what if I have to go to Italy again with their Tiramisu, Gelato and Calzone looking so beseechingly at me....! ;-)

[RosieC]

The office birthdays thing: In the last place I worked, the format was that the birthday person would arrange their goodies in the office kitchen and then send round an email to announce that it was there. So not only were you not faced with a person pushing cake at you, you even had a warning by email to stay out of the kitchen for the rest of the day.

How about sneakily hinting to the office manager that the birthday person seems to have to spend a lot of time handing round the cakes and wouldn't it be more efficient to do it the kitchen & email way? Or if your own birthday is coming up, do it that way and hope it catches on?

I know this doesn't solve the underlying problem. For me, I'm sure that particular situation is related to wanting to please, and finding as a child that I could please my mother by eating what she had prepared for me. This makes it extremely hard to say no when anybody is asking me to eat something in a one to one situation.

[Slidesdownmountains]

Thanks Rosie - this would work if only we weren't sat right next to the open-plan tea/coffee area where everyone deposits their goods! Hahaha - am up against it at work! :-/ One time they spent £160 on these beautiful pastel-coloured-icing muffins each the size of a baseball for someone's leaving do *sigh*
I try my best but it is a sugar-fest in here most days

[MellyG]

I do a kind of cognitive therapy called Dialectical Behavioral Therapy. It was designed for individuals with a lot of difficulty regulating emotions, but as it turns out, emotion regulation is something a lot of us need help with. In DBT, therapist do practice coping skills along with clients so I do use a lot of these things in my life.

I know that exercise is very effective when I'm stressed and that's something I need to do more of! I most often use mindfulness skills during challenging situations, though. One game I'm starting to play with food is called "urge surfing." My husband has TONS of carbage in the house that he is constantly eating (but he has a great metabolism). I'm currently working on mentally stepping back and observing the urges to eat junk and just noticing how the rise and fall, sometimes repeatedly, before they go away. It makes a difference to look at these experiences with willingness to work with them as well as intellectual curiosity rather than freaking out that the urges are there.

Rosie and Slides, do people at your work know you have quit junk food. If they do, you don't need to constantly explain your choices. If not, that may be something to think about, both why you haven't told them or how you will tell them. I haven't told people "I'm doing Atkins" because I know about all the misconceptions out there about the woe. I have told people, though, "I'm going to be a pretty picky eater from now on" and explained about cutting most carbs initially and then reintroducing to see which I respond well to and which I don't. People don't realize that this is what Atkins is!!!

It's also very likely, Slides, that others are eating more than they would like with a table of goodies right out in the open for you to see and smell all the time!!!! I would take an office poll and, if others do have trouble and there is another place for it, see if that stuff could be moved.

It's tough, though, isn't it?! We're trying to change some very deeply ingrained habits! I think the increased assertiveness, self-care, and emotional coping skills that successful Atkins folks pick up along the way are what can make this journey truly life changing for many of us. It's not just about the weight loss, for sure.

[Slidesdownmountains]

Thanks, Melly - I will give the mindfulness and 'surfing' a go once I have purged my house and work-drawers of the crappy foods I have put in them Old habits die hard, as they say, but I see no reason I can't crack them!
Thanks again for your thoughts

[Eama]

I just started back on Atkins today after a break of some months where I gained back half of what I lost before.

I have a bundle of emotional issues: severe social anxiety (do I eat to 'hide' myself or is eating a comfort mechanism?), very low self esteem (again... cause or affect? Both?) Do I use my obesity as a crutch? (Don't expect much from me... it's obvious nothing much will come from me!)

I don't know what's 'wrong' with me, and I don't have money to seek therapy. I'm just concentrating now on being more positive about myself. Focusing on strengths instead of weaknesses. Hopefully I can keep it up this time.

[Whatsername]

EaMa...I relate to what you said. I have a lot of issues and therapy has helped me a lot (Cognitive Behaviour). It was a long road for me to change my thought processes. I know you said you can't do therapy but is there anything available where you live that would be free?

One thing I have learned is what you said...redirecting my thoughts. Thinking of strengths instead of weakness. I am bipolar but lean towards depression. I also have anxiety issues. Another thing I have learned is to find something I enjoy doing and focus on that. I scrapbook and baseball has been my passion too.

Write anytime..we are always here.
Jane

[Kntrylady]

Wow !! What an emotional and insightful thread. I would be surprised if there was anyone on ADBB that couldn't see themselves in some of these posts. I know I certainly can.

What I find weird is the fact that the poison foods that I succumb to, I really don't enjoy all that much. The rice, the potatoes, the cookies, the candies... when I'm honest with myself, I don't enjoy them very much. But I'm addicted to them like a heroin addict.

I was watching one of Dr. Oz's shows I had recorded last night, and they were talking about emotional eating vs eating for nourishment. They discussed the brain/body reactions and how to work through some of these temptations. What I found interesting was when they said an emotional craving normally lasts no more than 10-15 minutes. Their theory is to not allow yourself to get hungry or thirsty, eating something at least 3 meals and 2 snacks a day, and drink lots of water. If you do this, and you KNOW ahead of time that the craving won't last longer than 10-15 minutes, it becomes something you can control and ride through.

How about when that craving hits, can you use it as an excuse to "have to" run to the bathroom, walk accross the building to pick something up, refill you drinking glass, etc. Anything to break the fixation?

Like I said, I just saw this last night so I haven't had a chance to put it into practice, but had to share.

[chinadoll]

Wow. I agree with what everyone is saying. I feel it a little differently. Its almost like there is mental energy that goes into staying focused each day. Its like a levee with a tiny cork in one little leaky spot. It seems effortless to keep the wall intact (at least most days) but then a day comes along when the stress or activity or change in schedule or emotional upheaval and sometimes even happiness and giddyness just opens a door in that mental mindset and I relax. Let go. Just for one snack, or one fine meal. I actually sometimes even CHOOSE to pull that cork out. Why? I do it. and then, its like a dam has burst and I seem to see all that focus washed away. It usually takes me weeks to gather up the debris and reconstruct my mental attitude to restart.

Now, if I could just figure out how to prevent that little leak or maybe cement that cork in place....

I think Melly got it with that building tension for that food high. This summer I became obsessed with the idea of a hot fudge sundae. I don't even like hot fudge all that much, but I was under a lot of stress and the idea just wouldn't leave me. I wanted it--not just for an afternoon. This was building for literally days. Every time I passed the Carvel--at night in front of the TV--on my way home from the gym!!! I finally caved and it was good, but it wasn't that good. I wondered why I had though it was so wonderful and important. I felt gross afterwards. But the tension was gone. And if I had been able to jump back on track the next day I wouldnt have sweated it too horribly. But I did have trouble getting back on track and that is the killer. One of the lessons I see myself needing to learn for maintenance is that if something is fixated in my head like that, I may be better off having one bite of something early on and dip my toe in (and a couple extra carbs) rather than let it build until I want to totally derail with a big cannonball splash (and enough carbs to send my sugar sky high and derial me again). I don't know the answer. If I did, I wouldnt still be 70 pounds from goal.