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Some rambling thoughts

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I was watching House Hunters just now and the client on the show, the house hunter, is a very slim woman and I remember the first thing I thought was, I am going to look like that one day soon !! And then I stopped amazed. I had replaced my old recording of, it must be nice to be slim like that, or I wish I was slim like that to, That is how I am going to be one day soon. Wow, that is huge progress for me !!
I am so excited that the old recordings are being replaced without me making a huge effort to do it. My desire to be healthy and slim and my determination to not get diabetes and to be healthy took over and replaced those old negitive thoughts that I would never look like that or it would be too hard, or can I really stay on this diet for life and get healthy and slim and stay that way . I am so excited and proud of my change in thinking.
For the first time in my life, I honestly trust myself to do what I need to do to be healthy and happy and live a long life.
Oh, and I asked the insurance company when I was on the phone asking about if I need a referral for specialists, if they cover surgery if you lose a lot of weight and your stomach leaves an apron and she would not say yes, but what she said is you would have to go through the steps to get approved. That is not a yes, but not a no either.
Hey, lets face it, once you lose all your weight, if you have some loose skin, that is a pretty nice problem to have, compared to being fat and unhealthy and not fitting in places that are too small and finding clothes that look okay, so in perscpective it is not that important, but I am still glad there is a chance they would pay for a good part of it , lol !! I had them on the phone anyway, so why not ask , lol !!
The fact that I am contemplating that day when I have the weight off and most likely will have loose skin is a far cry from where I was just weeks or even days ago.
Once the mind is set, the body will follow if you ask me, so I am beyond thrilled and so happy to feel the differance in my thinking !!
I do not want to be sick and I will be if I do not do what I have to do, so in my mind, this is not a choice but what I have to do if I want the life I envison for myself.
I have never had a bucket list before, which I hate that term, but what you want to do before you die is not much better, ummm,
how about a things I want to do in my lifetime list , that is much less morbid but is the same thing.
I have never really done one because I think I just did not think I could have those things. If you can't lose weight, how are you going to have a successful business or travel the world or have your dream home, but now I am seeing I can have anything I want wow, that is exciting !!
So, look out world, I am dreaming again and dreaming big because I can and anything is possible in this new life I am claiming. It is a wonderful future out there and I am so excited about it for the first time in a very long time !!
Stephie

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