What is wrong with me?

divaindubai · #1 June 2nd, 2006, 02:05 AM

I've been battling my weight since I was a child.

Was never "fat" but had to watch my weight, then after having my first childn in 1994 I balooned up to the 240's and then I managed to go to Jenny Craig and went down to 209 as a lowest since my older son has been born. Over the years because of an unhappy first marriage and stress of going through university, I balooned up to 270's and then got pregnant with my second child in 2000 and he was born in 2001. I didn't really gain anything with the pregnancy because I was watching my weight like a hawk, but then because of a divorce, etc and more unhappiness and major stresses in life I just let myself go and balooned up to 310. I went back to Jenny Craig and managed to lose about 30 + pounds, and never regained any of it back, but found it was too expensive. I in the meantime got remarried to a wonderful man, and moved overseas to the Middle East and here I am 30 pounds lower than when I stopped Jenny Craig (around 250). I have been aware of Atkins for about 2 or 2.5 years now, and have noticed a change in my eating habits as a whole. I am much more conscious about my intake of food as a whole, and drinking about at least 4 - 5 litres of water a day (at least during the week while at work -- the weekends I slack off a bit but have to work on the water intake on the weekends).

After I moved here about 2 years ago, I did join a Nutrition centre here and they follow a semi-Atkins, more or less a low carb low fat diet, and so I went there for a few months and managed to lose around 20 pounds (got me down to about 260's or so). When I joined this board back in Jan. 2005 I had just finished goig to that Centre.

Why am I still at the same weight?? Am I a failure? Will this WOE ever work for me? What is wrong with me?

Overall, I do applaud myself for having changed many aspects of my eating habits which are different from over the years. I do find that I tend to go on binges at times of things that I know I should not eat plain and simple, but then I somehow get into the mindset of "oh I'll restart this WOE tomorrow", then sometimes tomorrow comes and get into this vicious cycle.

I recently went back to this Nutrition Centre again, low carb low fat, and the doctor told me not to exercise for a week or so just for the first while, and they also sell Atkins products there, so part of the diet was to eat the Atkins Endulge bars. They are teeny tiny as it is, and I was only supposed to eat 1/2 at a time. I found they really triggered my sweet cravings. I was also taking fat burner and fat blocker pills at the same time.

I did manage to lose about 3.5 kgs the first week of going to this Centre, and also I tried to find a positive note on the fact that since I had gone there ( i think my last weigh in at that Centre last year was sometime in Febraury or March) -- I didn't gain anything, managed to lose a bit of weight, which I was happy about-- BUT it isn't ENOUGH.

What is wrong with me? Sorry to rant and rave but I'm just fed up. I feel embarassed with myself feel like I'm never goig to get anywhere.

Oh in December my Mom had come from Canada for a visit, and I did gain a bit of weight, my mistake. but in January and for about 5 - 6 weeks I managed to get the weight off plus lose a bit more and I was exercising quite faithfully, like every day practically for 30 minutes on my eclyptical. I was feeling like I was toning up and everything. Then my Mother in law came for a visit and stayed with us for 2 months. It was rather stressful than I anticipated it to be (sadie136 you know all about this!

), so ther went my exercise routine out the window. I was diong quite well, I would get up every morning around 5:30 a.m, cmoe onto ADBB for a bit, and then exercise, that way I would get my exercise in for the day, no excuses.

What can I do differently? I would be grateful to receive any responses.

Sometimes I feel like re-introducing myself onto this Board, and starting at the 14-day induction thread all over again, and not self-sabotaging myself.

To those of you who are successful on this, how did you do it? How much exercise should I be doing a day to see some dramatic results? What can I do differently?

Sorry to ramble and also probably repeat myself a few times,

Thanks for listening!

msnicksmom · #2 June 2nd, 2006, 02:35 AM

Thank you for being so brave and articulate to share your story.

Atkins WORKS because it's high fat low carb to start with. A clean induction helps you get rid of those cravings and the fat keeps you from feeling deprived so you stick with it. Doing Atkins by the book is going to be the best suggestion! Look at the success stories forum, keep your exercise up, get the junk out of your house, work on whole foods, and you WILL be successful!!!

**Elizellen** · #3 June 2nd, 2006, 02:53 AM

Hi Divina

Welcome back to your ADBB family.

What sort of menus are you eating at present? Maybe posting a few daysworth in the 'Review my Menu' forum would get some useful feedback in case you have chosen a likely 'staller' to include.

What phase of Atkins are you following at the moment or have you slipped off the Atkins wagon? If you are likely to be well out of ketosis you might be well served by following an induction-style regime for a week or more to get back in ketosis and start to balance your body's equalibrium then climbing up the OWL ladder again.

Were you here on ADBB when we set up the Second Time Around forum (aka STAC)? It was started for people just like you who have had success in the past and need extra support to get going again. You might feel happier posting in there where many other 'returners' hang out and support each other through the problems that many-timers experience that are different to the problems first-timers have on their 14 days on induction.

As to exercise - you know you need to get back into that again. Maybe joining one of the Exercise Challenges will be the kickstart you need? Pop over to the Exercise Challenges Forum or the 6 Week Exercise Challenge forum and see which one appeals to you.

The 6WEC#27 is due to start next week so your timing couldnt be better!!
For the 6WEC you only have to commit for however days a week of exercise you feel you want to aim for, so you are not competing with anyone but yourself. Also you decide what constitutes 'exercise' for your own body - so if walking once round the block twice a week, or using the stairs three stimes a week instead of the lift/elevator means you are getting in more exercise than usual that could be your definition of exercise until you feel able to increase it to something more energetic.

Hope this helps.

LC_Dave · #4 June 2nd, 2006, 05:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by divaindubai

I do find that I tend to go on binges at times of things that I know I should not eat plain and simple, but then I somehow get into the mindset of "oh I'll restart this WOE tomorrow", then sometimes tomorrow comes and get into this vicious cycle.

Diva,

Babe,

Cut this binging behaviour now!

This sort of behaviour won't get you where you want to go!

There is nothing wrong with you! There is something wrong with your blood sugar, and this effects your moods and your appetite.

You have to get it Crystal clear in your mind, that you must do something DRASTIC! You need to make a drastic radical change to you habits, and make it a long term commitment!

Don't go to Jenny Craig centres and other things, unless you want to pay them money for the rest of your life!!!

DO NOT START A DIET CHANGE UNLESS YOU CAN KEEP IT UP FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE!!

Put yourself first! Make your weight loss & Control the most important thing in your life, even above your mother!

If people are sabotaging you, just ignore their behaviour, and do what is healthy for you!!

Absoutely NOBODY will do this for you. You have to be in the drivers seat!

*kicks diva in bum!*

I know you are a strong willed spirit, you just need to focus that mind of yours on this goal, this target! You have to become strict and obsessed with the Goal!

Get the Atkins book out, and do Induction. Follow every single little rule, and don't once cheat!

The great thing about Atkins is that the Higher OWL stages are very tastey and yummy!

Spoil Yourself! PUT YOURSELF FIRST!

divaindubai · #5 June 2nd, 2006, 05:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by msnicksmom

Thank you for being so brave and articulate to share your story.

Atkins WORKS because it's high fat low carb to start with. A clean induction helps you get rid of those cravings and the fat keeps you from feeling deprived so you stick with it. Doing Atkins by the book is going to be the best suggestion! Look at the success stories forum, keep your exercise up, get the junk out of your house, work on whole foods, and you WILL be successful!!!

Thank you msnicksmom

I just felt I needed to let it all out in this thread and get my frustrations out. I remember how I was feeling back in January when I would do so well at my exercise and saw the scale moving again and also I was doing a good job on this WOE. I have to be prepared better for during the week for example and get my meals prepared for when I'm at work, etc.

Thanks again!

#6 June 2nd, 2006, 05:54 AM

It is so hard to say why it is not working ....but I am so glad to see you back again trying my love

My idea would be to see menus for a few days and then we can kind of puzzle through this ...

I think the issue for most people (including me) is finding "content" and not eating too much food...

where are you starting from now and what are you eating? those are the two things we need to evaluate to help you get your new groove on

OOOXXX welcome back baby girl!!!

divaindubai · #7 June 2nd, 2006, 05:57 AM

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