Fear and loathing!!!! Advice please!!

[theirishone]

Okay not a great title i admit but this has been my feeling surroundin food for 4 years...
I have a really terrible history with food, mainly in the past 4 years. It all started when my father passed away very suddenly when i was 21. I was slightly overweight and wanted to be slimmer but it wasnt as all consuming back then and although i wasnt happy with my weight i look back now and realise that overall i was happy! After my dad died i lost alot of weight very quickly, i actually didn't eat much food at all for about a month, i dropped 2 stone to 9 1/2 stone really quickly because of the stress but naturally my weight was the least of my worries. When life started to regain a bit of normality my mum noticed my weight loss, as did all my friends, after that i became obsessed with my weight, probably because it gave me something else to focus on! I only ate about once a week, after which i would stare in the mirror convinced i could see the weight gain from the tiny meal i had just consumed! I weighed myself daily, sometimes 10 times a day, if even 1/4 of a lb had gone on i would go for a massive walk! Since then i have been trapped in a cycle of starving myself and being thin and miserable then binge eating and purging and being even more miserable. Although i know i am not that overweight (most people tell me im not overweight at all) i am much happier when i am slimmer, isn't everyone?! Having said that Atkins for me is more than losing the weight that i am unhappy with, it is about trying to break free from this seemingly endless cycle. I am only 25 but i feel like i have been battling these demons for too long already!! Its time for me to move onwards and upwards (metaphorically, the scales better not! lol)
This coming week marks the fourth annivarsay of my daddys passing. I feel i have let food take over my life for the past four years and i cant continue to live like this!
I only joined the board a few days ago but have been looking at the posts for the past few weeks and have found some of the people on here truely inspirational.
As i have already mentioned in a previous post i have fallen off the wagon once already after 8 days o the induction, due to alcohol (another one of my demons that started to become an issue around the same time as food).
I am finding the diet relatively easy to stick to (apart from the no alcohol) but the amount of food is quite daunting!! I am seriously struggling to eat the amount of food that is necessary to make Atkins effective!
To be honest i dont want to make this WOE about weight loss, i want it to be a new beginning and a fresh start as far as eatin is concerned. Is it still benificial for me to do the induction? I have read all the post on emotional eating but if anyone out there could give me some advice or help to get me on my way it would be very much appreciated!!

x J x

[stephbob]

It's difficult to offer advice in these kinds of situations. Ask yourself what your reason for Atkins is - is it sticking to a weight loss plan that will allow you to consiously eat more food while knowing it won't cause you to gain weight?
Yes, Atkins works, but I wouldn't want you to join this WOL only to give up again and become even more food-focused.

At the end of the day, if you are being serious about choosing Atkins, then you need to realise that you NEED to eat that amount of food for it to work. I doubt you have much weight to lose at all, judging from the post, so please don't enter with the assumption that you will lose a lot of weight very quickly. It will be a slow process if you lose anything at all (I don't know what you weigh right now)

But Atkins will not make you gain weight if you follow it to the letter and eat enough! If you don't eat enough, you will go into starvation mode.

I hope that helps, and welcome to the boards

[jennbeingme]

I can relate. I struggled with binging and purging / obsessing about my weight from 16-23 and it still pops up now and then -as in the minute I start to count calories or try to lose weight I start obsessing again.( I'm 39). Weighinh myself multiple times a day, guilt feelings about what I eat etc....
I went to a nutritionist who gave me the best advice. Just try to eat what 3 times a day plus a snack and what you know is healthy. DO NOT weigh yourself and be sure to exercise. Sounds easier than it really is- I know. Also- please consult a health care professional who will be able to help you. It is way too hard to try to do on your own. It's kind of like being an alcoholic- you need to change your mindset and your behaviour to be healthy.
I weigh myself 1X a week and the local health centre. There is no scale in my home. Honestly- with Atkins, I have been the healthiest I have ever been losing weight- emotionally and physically. but that's just me. I also do minimal weighing, measuring, counting etc... and just try to concentrate on how my stomach feels.

Good luck!