Just Listen, And Give your advice.

**killerbombshell** · March 19, 2006, 10:50 AM

Re: Just Listen, And Give your advice.

Ok let's run down the list. Welcome to the board, blah blah blah. We're great supportive and inspiring bunch. But now it's time to hop on the Straight Talk Express, which means some tough love.

In your introductory post you said you didn't know when you were going to start or even quite how. Do you own Dr Atkins New Diet Revolution 2002 edition? This is the first step to getting excited about changing your life to this wonderful way of eating. It outlines, in excrutiating detail, the way you are going to live your life if you're going to get serious about eating and low carbing. Buy it today. If you don't have it, reread it. This is going to be your Bible and key to weight loss. It is also the book that we give advice on.

Second, forget how much you used to weigh and forget about being a "compulsive overeater." This is your life now and you need to take control of it. Your old weight is basically irrelevant to what you are right now; the weight you've gained is a "sunk cost"; stop feeling bad about it. You just have to deal with the fact you weigh what you weigh and move on. Feeling motivated about the future, getting exercise, drinking water, taking vitamins--all "hippie" sounding natural cures are part of the Atkins diet are all essential to fighting depression.

Third, get rid of the junk food and change the roommate if necessary. Ask him to respect your wishes and keep the food in his room if he must. If he can't and you can't move, you have to figure out which is more important--that food or your health. My boyfriend eats most of his meals from McDonalds or frozen pizza, and while it's tempting, you just get over it if you really want to change your life. If anything, you're setting a bad example for your son who at 14 months is absolutely on the wrong track and a disasterous path for his own eating. We have many mothers here who are raising small children to enjoy and appreciate the low carb meals that they cook.

And lastly, get serious. Get the food out of the house, plan your meals a week ahead of time, go shopping, get ready to drink yourself to death, and EXERCISE. Read the forum daily. Prepare yourself ahead of time, don't just wake up in the morning and doom yourself to failure.

I know this sounds harsh, but it's only because I want you to do well! I've found lots of success on this diet, but it wasn't until I hit "rock bottom" and got serious did I truly change my life and my attitude towards myself.

**Piasabird** · March 20, 2006, 10:27 AM

Re: Just Listen, And Give your advice.

If anything, you're setting a bad example for your son who at 14 months is absolutely on the wrong track and a disasterous path for his own eating. We have many mothers here who are raising small children to enjoy and appreciate the low carb meals that they cook.

I'm sorry if I'm misinterpreting what killerbombshell wrote. But, please do not restrict your 14 month old baby's carbohydrates. Children need their carbs to develop. The only thing you should restrict is sugar. Buy him whole grain cereals and breads, old fashioned oatmeal and brown rice, and whole wheat pastas. But please don't put him on a low carb/high fat plan like Atkins at his age. You'll just have to put those things off limits to yourself if you follow Atkins. If anything just teach him to eat normal sized portions and to eat a wide variety of veggies.

Now, about you. Yes, I do think you would benefit from counseling. In fact, I'm surprised your doctor is giving you anti depressants and not suggesting some counseling in conjunction with the drug therapy. Sometimes just talking to someone will do a person so much good. Take those first steps to getting better or you're just going to go around and around in a vicious circle not getting anywhere. Make some positive changes in your life and take it one day at a time. If it's too hard thinking about all that's in front of you then break it down into smaller goals. As you suceed and reach each one of your smaller goals you're going to feel better about yourself.

Good luck!

**sombersusie** · March 20, 2006, 11:03 AM

Re: Just Listen, And Give your advice.

hey mcfattie! my advice would be to 'set yourself up for success' . First read the book and the helpfull stickys on the board for advice. (or just ask us

) Second would be make sure you have plenty of induction friendly stuff in the house and ready for when you need it. If it takes making a couple packages of bacon at a time and then storing some do it! I know with kids its hard to just whip things up in an instant, so the times you can prepare ahead it's time well spent. A few more things to have on hand would be cheese, boiled eggs, cut up celery or broccoli.
It's hard to live with someone who isn't on the diet with you, (but at least he seems somewhat supportive) , maybe he'd be willing to at least read the book and help you cook that way. Hamburgers, steaks, what guy doesn't love em?
As much as possible try to ignore the negative comments from family and 'friends'. You are trying to do what is best for you, not for them.
as far as fast food goes, my husband and i eat hamburgers from mcd's probably once a week. It's more of a hamburger salad but it's good in a pinch, no buns or fries of course

take care!

**Richt** · March 20, 2006, 11:07 AM

Re: Just Listen, And Give your advice.

Just a thought, but it might also be worth changing your user name?!

Mcfattie sounds horrible and I am sure people wont want to call you it, as it sounds so derogitory.

Let me know if you want it changed and I will do so.

Rich

**2big4mysize** · March 20, 2006, 11:42 AM

Re: Just Listen, And Give your advice.

welcome to the board and to Atkins

so you have a 14 month old to motivate you not to eat yourself to death.
you want to lose weight so now it the time to change the wanting to to and action plan.

Talk with your new roommate about what he can do to be part of your Atkins support network like keeping his high carb foods away from you and then clean out trhe pantry/kitchen so you have your foods his foods and the baby's foods surely you wouldn't steal from your kid but if you would then ask your room mate to keep the high carb junk food for the baby too. Now read DR ATKINS NEW DIET REVOLUTION 2002 edition cover to cover and then reread chapter 11. As you will see Atkins is about eating veggies (yep I said veggies, 6 servings according to USDA serving sizes during induction and even more later in OWL) that are healthy and low in carbs and in glycemic impact along with your healthy fats and proteins, drinking losts of water, taking trhe supplements you need ( since you are seeing a doc ask them if you are deficinet in any vit or mineral now), and doing the mandatory daily exercise part of your Atkins too.

Happy low carbing

**Mcfattie** · March 20, 2006, 01:17 PM

Re: Just Listen, And Give your advice.

Thanks everyone for you comments. I know I need to get my butt in gear, for a while....Jeesh today has been pretty good....

I guess....

I don't want to change my name yet, it's kind of a joke, that everyone says , when i eat I say "I feel like a fatty mcfat fat."Kind of like the mcdonalds mcchiken things lol....but thanks for trying

**Mcfattie** · March 20, 2006, 01:33 PM

Re: Just Listen, And Give your advice.

Today, I had some turkey,and some cheese cubs. They were pretty good. My dad yelled at me again today. I haven't ate all day long. Because I've been pretty busy. So I was in the kitchen looking for some carb friendly foods. (I'm here at my parents because they asked me to house sit while they go to a funral)I grabbed a couple of cheese cubs,and some deli select turkey...I was just standing there minding my own business then he yelled at me...saying "U've got to stop eating" He siad it in front of this guy that I really really like, I've never been so humilated in my life!!! I Just wanted to cry right there, still hard to hold it back. So, I ignored it, thinking that one day he'll have nothing to say about my weight, and then he said "get you some diet pills or something to help you from ebing so fat, you look nasty "And then he laughed, i was like okay i know, and then i looked up at my guy that i like,and my face was already red, he smirked,and my dad said 'haha he isn't going to say anything, but he is thinking the same thing' So my whole self esteem boost was shot down. I mean I know I shouldn't let anyone make me feel any less, but sometimes you can't help but do that.

Doesn't it just make you so mad when people do this?I never really saw myself as disgustingly fat. I've seen myself as big, and chunky. But never like that. Now lately i'm in faturated with big clothes, mirrors, and diets. I know it seems like i'm on a pity trip but this is my journal, and I just need to let everything out.The guy i like only likes smaller girls, but i never tried to lose any weight because of him. I figured if he doesn't like me for me then so what. That's why we've never really dated. Then everone starts saying stuff about my weight,and it's starting to get to me.You know i won't even date anyone now because i'm self conisounce about my weight, i never figured I'd feel this low. I used to be anorexic, or borderline....and slowly, ever so surely i'm slipping back into those habits. My dad says that being anorexia would be a blessing to me. I know i shouldn't listen to him.

But sometimes you just can't help but sit and cry...I'm done venting now. Thanks for listening, or reading........blah.

**sombersusie** · March 20, 2006, 01:53 PM

Re: Just Listen, And Give your advice.

oh my goodness! girl you got to get out of that house! i know he's your dad but apparently he missed the parenting class on "how to be supportive to your offspring". Honey if that is what you had to deal with growing up i can understand why you're having troubles now... *hugs*. You're absoutely right people should love you for who you are, not what you are.
If you can manage it get away from those toxic people or at the very least ignore everything that comes out of his mouth!!!

**Splandrea** · March 20, 2006, 02:02 PM

Re: Just Listen, And Give your advice.

By the way, you can actually stuff your face if you feel like you need to on this diet/woe. I am a compulsive overeater and there are times when I "lose it" and eat like crazy, but its cheese and almonds and salad and steak.. and I still lose weight. I really feel like I don't have control of my eating, but I am making choices to eat low carb foods and it is paying off. Maybe I will never be able to control myself, but the cool thing about Atkins is you CAN eat 6 deviled eggs and the scale is still merciful. I try very hard to stick to a strict Atkins induction, but I stray away, like I have on every diet I have ever been on. As long as I only stray to low carb things, I actually do not gain and usually end up still losing a pound that week.

By the way, my dad is really harsh to me too. He has been since highschool. I am now 28 and out of the house, but they actually used to boobie trap the refridgerator and degrade me and make me feel horrid about myself. I realize now that my dad is just very worried that I will end up with diabetes like him or a heart problem or any number of problems that can happen when you are obese, he just has a terrible way of showing his "concern." I have accepted that in him and I know he loves me, but I try to stay away from his negativity and anger about it and just stick to low carbin and now every time I see him I am a few pounds lighter. He probably will not stop yelling at me until I am down under 180 pounds, but I am going in the right direction, and I know he will come around and realize that I am on the right woe. I have to do this for me. You have to do this for you. You will be very suprised at how fast the pounds fly off! PM me and I will give you a list of things I eat from day to day, even when I am "cheating." I think you will realize that you can eat a lot of good food and still see health and weight benefits!

I am planning on seeing a counselor about my issues, but at least I am not sabotaging my body any longer with carbohydrates.

HANG IN THERE!

**ttdriver** · March 22, 2006, 07:12 PM

Re: Just Listen, And Give your advice.

Definitely seek some good holistic counseling. First and foremost. Ask your doctor for names of counselors. If you work, perhaps you can get employee assistance that provides a certain number of sessions free (typically the first 3).

You can lose the weight on Atkins, but the reasons *behind* the overeating must be dealt with. Just taking anti-ds won't get it done.

Betty

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