Cheating

[knicknack]

Hi everyone!

I've been thinking about the topic of cheating for a while now. Some people on this board have the attitude that you must not ever ever give in to anything. But it occurs to me that sometimes there are things that are more important than doing Atkins 100% successfully. I'll get back to that later.

I also think that there are two ways to do atkins. One as a way of life and one as a diet. I think it is those that regard it as a diet that are the first to fail, and for whom cheating or splurging is often a path to falling completely off the atkins WOE. They give in to the ice cream not because they are making a conscious decision to do so, but because they cannot resist - in a lot of cases cravings become more pronounced if you are not allowed to eat a certain thing. So the distinction lies in that, to me. Are you 'not allowed' to eat carbs, or are you 'choosing' not to eat carbs? If you are choosing, then you are stating that you have control over your eating, and in my opinion a splurge or cheat is MUCH less likely to make you spin out of control for the simple fact that you have control over your eating.

Can a choice to eat a carb-food be a 'cheat' if you are actually involved in the decision making? And I don't mean the kind of choice you make when you cave into a craving, either. The word cheat is imbued with all kinds of negative connotations - what makes a cheat a cheat? And what makes it not a cheat?

This is the question I've been pondering. I feel like there is a difference.

Which leads me to my question of whether some things are more important than the atkins WOE. kbuchs brought up that her grandfather makes a special blackberry jelly and when the family gets together he delights in making brunch for everyone. I'm sure he takes great pride in this. This to me is an instance of a moment when *choosing* to have blackberry jelly would be a valid choice. Perhaps your grandfathers tradition/feelings is/are more important than not having those carbs, and perhaps it makes you feel like part of the family to participate. Those things can be important too.

(Granted, if grandpa makes brunch every week, the point is moot. Let's assume it's only a couple of times a year)

But that brings me back to the original question: why is it that some people can have the jelly and not the pringles and the pound cake, and others will (allow themselves to) fall off the wagon just from having a teaspoon of jelly?

I just can't help but think that it's the distinction between a way of life - a total change in attitude about eating - and a diet.

And yes, there will be those for whom cheating leads them off the path completely no matter what their attitude towards this WOE. I realize this. Sugar can be evil.

I was just wondering what people thought about this.

** please note that I'm not advocating that you can choose carbs whenever you want, but that there are times where something else might be important enough to make that choice valid. **

[pjade1]

Well, said. I totally agree with your way of thinking. We all need to be in control with this WOE. If we choose to eat something with carbs and know we are making a concious decision to do so, we should not feel that we cheated as long as you get back on the wagon to Aktins WOE. I think having a bite of "something you aren't supposed to" will satisfy that craving. It is giving in to eating anything you want all the time is what is going to hurt us. I think if you know you are doing it and can get back to this WOE, you will not have a problem. One day, one meal, or one bite shouldn't hurt you if you can jump right back.

[Sarah1341]

I absolutely agree with you!! Well said. Life is life and there will be times that we cannot or will not stick completely low carb (special occasions for instance, or conferences where food options are limited but you are forced to stay, or trips to Barbados - how often does that happen?). If we make a conscious decision to "splurge" on some food with carbs, that was our decision. It does not mean that we need the all or nothing attitude and then go crazy eating. But you are right, for those that it is becoming a way of life, it will be easier for them to have those splurges and move on from it. Great post!

[kebdal23]

I agree with your post.

However, for some people it can fail . . . for example - last year I had a trip planned to the Wisconsin Dells for a weekend. I gave in and chose to eat carbs because a lot of low-carb food wasn't available to me. When I got home from my trip, I wasn't able to go back to eating low-carb. Maybe I hadn't dedicated myself enough to this WOE.

BUT - if you have truly changed your lifestyle, one event or special occasion should not ruin your overall success as long as you make the right choices!

[Sarah1341]

Originally Posted by kebdal23

BUT - if you have truly changed your lifestyle, one event or special occasion should not ruin your overall success as long as you make the right choices!

Exactly!

I have fallen too and it has taken me some time to get to a point that right now I feel confident that if I splurged on something I could just continue on with this woe and not be fearful of going into carb overload and not being able to get back on track for a week/weeks. Maybe it takes each one of us to know our own strengths and weaknesses. I also know that right now I should not have a splurge, as I'm struggling with slow weight loss. Wouldn't want to effect that any more.

[michigangirly]

i applaud your post. thanks for your insight. i totally agree with what you said.

[Brook]

"Know thyself."

I agree with what you're saying - for the most part. The problem is that most of us landed here because of an innate inability to control this exact aspect of our eating habits/emotional habits. If the majority of people had the ability to exercise self control and make exceptions to the rule - and have them be exceptions - we wouldn't have the obesity epidemic that we do. The bottom line is that until you follow the rules of the plan and learn to make it a habit, stepping out of that ring is a recipe for disaster -and I think we've all seen enough people do it to know that's true.

Like I said, I agree with your thought process - but do not believe it's practical in application for the vast majority of people who are taking on the weight-loss endeavor.

While I addressed the majority of my weight loss/health, I kept in mind that there are big differences between weight-loss phases and pre-maintenance/maintenance phases. PM/M are times when we start to step out of the ring and learn what we can and can't do outside the basic structure of the program. Giving yourself permission to indulge/cheat because of this occasion/that occasion up until then is still giving the food the power and not the occasion and people/premise it's supposed to be about.

Just my $.02

~Brook

[Natasha]

This a xcellent topic Knack.....

I agree with you there are things more important than Atkins and there are going to be times when you cannot necessarily avoid a cheat (persay) or even want to b/c of some special occassion or whatever....

I remember sometime ago when i first started Atkins I got a really bad cold....and took regular cold medicine instead of going and hunting down the sugar free kind.... *God help me and the clerk if had to go to a pharmacy to look for sugar free cold medicine* But in my opinion thats a decision i chose, and no i don't consider it as a cheat in reference to my cold....somtimes you have to do what you have to do.....But im sure in the Atkins worlds and on this WOE it is considered just that since im on induction phase which is again my choice.

Now I think the reason people can cheat just from a tblspn of jelly is b/c they are making a decision to do so...trust me... they don't have to no matter how many cravings they are having...they do it b/c they figure well i have already blew it for today let me just eat all i can and the start induction back 2morrow.....I know this...done it myself....And this leads you right back where you started....Its called no self-control and we have all done this otherwise we wouldn't be here....

In life we are all given choices....and its up to us to make the right ones that are best for us. So a cheat in my opinion would be 1.) you choosing to cheat b/c of cravings 2.) your on induction and aware of what you are trying to accomplish but still making excuses to not eat the right things *cheating*

When it comes down to your life and whats best for you, you have to make the right decision and if it leads to having something thats not induction fitting then do it in moderation of course and then get back on the path....there are certain circumstance we can't avoid or for that matter are to special to avoid.

[knicknack]

Brook, I actually don't think we're disagreeing at all. it's a change of mindset the way that I look at it - and once you've made that switch from 'diet' and 'can't' to a way of life, I don't think self control and emotional habits (etc...) are an issue as much as they used to be. For some people that happens early, and others it may never happen - this is true.

But yes, 'know thyself' is the most important part.

I do want to take issue with one thing that pjade said though - I don't think that what I'm talking about makes it okay to take a bite because of a craving. What I'm talking about is that if you're going to philly for the first time and you've never had a philly cheese steak and have always wanted one - maybe it's okay to have a bite or two of the full thing before you just eat the meat and cheese. But, it's only okay if your mental attitude towards food has made that switch.

Take me, for example. I've started atkins a dozen times in the last few months, but it wasn't until my brain stopped thinking of food as a way to make me feel better emotionally (i've had some rough times) and I said 'I'm changing the way I eat and eating healthy (aka atkins)' as opposed to 'i need to lose those 15 pounds i gained' that I was actually able to do it and stick to it. I haven't cheated at all with any kind of foods, I've had a (low carb) beer here and there when out with my new friends, but that's it. But when I go to philly, I'm probably going to have a couple bites of the bread with my cheesesteak. ;-P

But please, do'nt take what I'm saying as meaning that it's okay to cheat, or give in to a craving. What I'm actually trying to point out is the difference between dieting and changing your attitude towards food (and how that relates to 'cheating').

[lots2lose]

I don't know to me that seems to be more of an excuse to cheat,and not necessarily that it's a special occassions.There are going to be lots of special occassions.The point is that when you start this WOE you make a promise to yourself that you are going to stop making excuses for a chance to cheat,you are actually gonna learn to control your eating through your Atkins WOE.Yes you can cheat but a special occassion is just justification.I don't care if today is my best friends birthday(it is) and she's going to have Ghanian food full of carbs that I'll probably never eat again after today.That's not the point.In deciding to do this WOL I decided I wasn't going to make any more excuses about food and I wasn't going to make bad choices.It's what gets us into the mindset that it's ok to cheat just this one time.You can't really cheat just one time.Those who justify their cheating makes it easier on themselves to feel less guilty about going back to old habits.For some us,the whole idea of eating special occassion foods have gotten us here.

And yes there are more important things than Atkins I suppose,but what is more important than one's health,a piece of chocolate cake?There are no distinctions in cheating,cheating is cheating period,whether is was a choice or not.I somehow think that's even worse and you are doing yourself a worse injustice by making up an excuse to cheat.Premeditated cheating is cheating anyway you look at it.If people really saw this WOE as a WOL as opposed to just a diet,then we wouldn't even harbor the thought of so-called cheating.I read so many posts on cheating here,and I always come to the same conclusion:Everyone tries to justify their cheating.Everyone.If you are trying to justify it then you shouldn't have done it.I do not even entertain the thought of cheating.I am a STAC member,and it's "cheating" on a special occassion that got me that membership.So anyway you cut it,cheating is cheating.If you can't take 6 or so months out of your life to better your health,and to go through the rungs until you reach the level where you can eat some of the foods you crave,then I don't know.This is just my opinion of course,but I see so much justifications for cheating it makes me sick.I wish people would erase it from their vocabulary as if the word never even existed.