Back in town after a long time

[illy]

Hi everyone,

Well, I'm back "in town" and I'm going to try very hard to stick with it this time. It's been a long time - close to 2 years. I had my 40th birthday in April, and let me tell you that isn't fun when the scale looks like mine does. I noticed my ticker here and it says that I'm down to 169. I wish. I'm right back at 185. Again. I've no real idea why I don't go higher than that unless my eating habits and level of activity just maintain it. 185 seems to have always been where I land when I'm doing nothing but eating whatever I want and not exercising. Blah.

So without any real preparation, I just woke up this morning and started back again. I've never had a problem with my age except when I am overweight. And I'm a yo-yo kinda chick from way back in high school. Right now, I'm hating the way I look. The mirror tells me, "Yup. You sure do look your age, and then some." My body just isn't the same at 185 as it was even a year ago. Lots of wobble going on, and that's NOT pretty.

So here I go. Tiptoeing into Atkins again. My goal isn't a number right now. My goal is a size, and I would like to get out of the 14s and back into a 10 in time to have some summer without covering up in baggy T-shirts.

Wish me luck.

[Outback Jess]

Hi Illy, you can do it, changing size is a matter of control. Working on a goal like a clothing size is especially insightful, considering you melt on this diet! Good luck to you and we are glad you are here.

[APanthesilia]

Welcome back Illy! You can do it!

[kellyf48]

I also turned 40 in May of this year and thats when i said THAT IS IT!! Must be a 40 thing LOL! Good luck to you

[willlose40]

Illy,

you sound like me all the way!! My problem was that once I got to 199 I would start eating and not takin care of myself because why-I was getting out of my "FAT BOX!"
I have learned that I did not have enought self-esteem, and I did not love myself, there are many books out there that are helpful and will help you "FLIP THE SWITCH!" in thinkin in the right direction. I will look for you to see how you are doing and you can do this! YOU ARE SO WORTH THIS AND MORE!!!!!!

Love
Yvette

[Tomorrow_I'll_Be_Perfect]

Hi illy! I think a lot of us here can relate to your story. Many of us have done this more times than we can remember. Good luck, and remember, only ~~ you ~~ can prevent muffin top. (can't you just see Smokey the Bear pointing his accusing finger at you?)

[APanthesilia]

Originally Posted by Tomorrow_I'll_Be_Perfect

Good luck, and remember, only ~~ you ~~ can prevent muffin top. (can't you just see Smokey the Bear pointing his accusing finger at you?)

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! I can totally see it!

[huggija]

Welcome back illy. You can do it!

[illy]

Holy cow! I'm blown away! Thanks for all the encouragement! Today is my second day perfectly on plan. To be honest, I tried to get back into it several times over the past few months. I had a goal at the beginning of the year that I would NOT be a fat-40. Halfway through every single day I would fall off the wagon, thinking, "well, tomorrow I'll get going right." Then tomorrow would come and I would think that since I was already screwing up the week, I might as well cave and start again Monday.

I know that "diet aids" aren't recommended, but I do admit that I am taking one for the time being. It's something that I actually found on a mens forum for bodybuilders that supposedly blocks carb cravings. It works, at least for me. The first few days are always so tough, but I am perfectly fine without any bad stuff so far. I probably won't take it for long, but if it helps get me over the hump of initial carb cravings, then I'm happy to have it. I hate taking any pills anyway, and since I already take blood pressure meds I figure I won't want to take anything else for long. With any luck at all, my blood pressure will start going back to normal once I get this weight off anyway. That's what my doctor thinks.

I haven't lost anything so far - only two days in - but I know Atkins and I know it won't be long.

I do have a wonderful thing in my world these days and that is my garden. I'm picking and cooking fresh squash, lettuce, onions and soon tomatoes too. Some of it will be for my hubby's taste buds only like the potatoes and corn, but I can live with that. I also have herbs growing so I'll soon be harvesting fresh basil, thyme, cilantro, sage, rosemary and dill. Can't wait for that! It's also lots of exercise, tending that garden. I was overzealous when I started planting and I have about a 20' X 30' plot out there that constantly requires weeding and tending. This evening I actually was out there with a tiny brush manually pollinating my tomatoes, cantaloupe, squash and cucumbers in case there haven't been enough bees and butterflies out there. Not leaving anything to chance!

I'm off to fix my ticker so it's telling the truth again.

[illy]

Woohoo! Lookit me! I lost 5 pounds in the first three days! YAY!