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Thread: Its all in your head

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  1. #1

    Join Date
    Apr 06, 2008
    Location
    China/New Jersey
    Posts
    17,137

    Default Its all in your head

    IT'S A MENTAL GAME

    I have started and stopped this journey countless times over the past decade. I have gotten lost, found my way back, stumbled more than once. I have probably lost 300 pounds or more all told, but times when I have gained back have made what was probably a two year journey a ten year saga.

    This past year has made me realize, more than ever, that this is not about the food or the diet as much as it is about my personal will, determination and plain stubbornness (both good and bad). I was really stuck for a long, long time between 230 and 245. I couldn't push past 228 no matter how hard I tried. This year I was able to break through and am finally making real solid progress again. And I am getting a better and better handle on why.

    I have seen quotes in folks' siggie lines that said things like "Every crunch brings you closer to goal" or "every bite off plan leaves you further from where you want to be".

    Needless to say I never really bought into it. There were lots of times when I ate a LITTLE off plan (not a binge) and didn't gain. Sometimes I might even get really lucky and lose. And exercise is great, makes me feel good, but did it really hurt to miss one run or one weight session here and there? Probably not from a physical standpoint.


    But...

    I now realize that the decisions to eat those little off plan bites and those lazy days without exercise did far more damage than I realized. Recently I have recognized more and more that this is all about your mental game. Every time I fail to do what I should I am weakening my conviction to see this through to the end. Every time I blow off the gym I am breaking the promise to myself to do what's best for me. Every time I take "just one bite" it makes it easier to do so the next time because I have already told myself
    it's OK once before so I know I am flawed and can't fight the urge.

    This is the real danger of not following through each and every day. We have all seen it---we get close to where we want to be, everything is humming along and then--we fall apart for no apparent reason. Overconfidence. Stubbornness that we can handle it. A refusal to surrender completely to the plan and just follow it as it should be.

    I know I can't play around with this and lose. In fact, I can't even lose on Atkins--I have to go the extra step to the Candida diet. But I know that total surrender is the only way I will get to goal. I can no longer kid myself that a pretty good effort is good enough. Not for a 52 year old woman who has been obese most of her life. Pretty good doesn't cut it. And as far as cheating and getting back on? Well we often say don't feel guilty just get back on plan quickly. We say that because guilt often leads to feeling bad about ourselves which often leads to even more binging. The fact is we should feel a little bad. Because we are worth it and we let ourselves down. We broke a promise. But the way to fix that is to promise to do better next time and get busy at doing it, not wallow and eat even more.

    So, I am just spouting off to tell all of you who have been fiddling around, seesawing a bit, not really losing but not doing too bad, that it may be time to reevaluate your commitment to yourself. Are you giving it your all? Or are you coasting along? Have you been lax? Has "good enough" been good enough?

    Just saying...
    Jill

    Back in ONEderland as of 7/27/2020!

    I was No longer OBESE. Just Overweight. I want to be back there again and am on my way. Last time I went from 300 to 189.
    Current: 253.6/193.0/169 or a size 10 is the GOAL


    Don't trade what you want MOST for what you want right now.



    Daily Checklist: 88 oz water daily - 90% of carbs from veggies - honoring dairy limits - weight work - cardio




  2. #2

    Join Date
    Feb 15, 2012
    Location
    All along the Eastern Coast, US
    Posts
    807

    Default Re: Its All In Your Head

    I completely agree -- it is ALL in your head.
    5 ft 7 in/small frame/skittle body type

    Start Date: 02/01/12

    Start: 169 lbs - size 12, Current: 125 lbs - size 2-4


    Mini-Goal #1: 140 lbs <~ Met 05/01/12
    Mini-Goal #2: 130 lbs <~ Met 07/01/12

    Restart: 09/10/12

    Goal: 120
    lbs


  3. #3

    Join Date
    Jul 06, 2012
    Location
    Happy Land, Tafea, Vanuatu, Vanuatu
    Posts
    1,439

    Default Re: Its All In Your Head

    Ooohh, I needed this! I get so frustrated when my weight sits in the same spot for too long, and I'm eating right and working out.

    It makes me want to give in sometimes.

    Thanks for writing this, it's very motivating!



  4. #4

    Join Date
    Sep 18, 2009
    Location
    Ontario Canada
    Posts
    1,086

    Default Re: Its all in your head

    I absolutely agree! Every time I say "no" to myself it's easier to say "no" the next time but every time I give in to myself I end up back at square one trying to get me rebalanced. Every time I allow myself to go off plan I make it harder to stick to plan. It really is what matters.

    Great Post!!
    SW 195......... March 2007
    Restart 172.4 November 8 2016
    CW 166.4 November 26, 2016
    GW 144

    Height 5' 5"
    Age 73 years

  5. #5

    Join Date
    Apr 17, 2007
    Location
    Central PA
    Posts
    11,508

    Default Re: Its all in your head

    You are absolutely right about breaking promises to ourselves. I know I've done it too many times and it only weakens me in so many ways. I have recommitted to this WOL because I know that it's the only thing that works to make any sense of my life and myself.

    Thank you for being you and being here for us!
    Aka Nyna ~~~~I LOVE ATKINS!!!

    "Either you run the day, or the day runs you". Jim Rohn
    X 52 X 64 X16

  6. #6

    Join Date
    Feb 28, 2011
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    526

    Default Re: Its all in your head

    Thank you, Chinadoll, for that awesome post!!!

  7. #7

    Join Date
    Sep 18, 2009
    Location
    Ontario Canada
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    1,086

    Default Re: Its all in your head

    Just wanting to tell you that today your post stayed in my mind and I've improved a couple things because if it. Thank you!!

    Now to remember that promises to myself are more important to my well being than promises to anyone else. Long ago I vowed never to break a promise or a confidence, and I have enjoyed the compliment that now and again is aimed in my direction because I don't criticize others behind their backs..........now I need to remember that uppermost to my success is keeping the promises to myself and to stop being critical of myself....just accept, aim for improvement and enjoy who I am.

    Anyone here to join me?
    SW 195......... March 2007
    Restart 172.4 November 8 2016
    CW 166.4 November 26, 2016
    GW 144

    Height 5' 5"
    Age 73 years

  8. #8

    Join Date
    Sep 30, 2012
    Location
    NW ILL
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    1

    Default Re: Its all in your head

    I enjoyed the original post and the follow-ups and thank you all! Nothing breeds motivation better than success! I'd like to add that we need to love ourselves enough to do the very best for our emotional and physical health. We are human and are flawed, and we will make a mistake or break a promise to ourselves....it's not an if, but a when. When that time comes we shouldn't beat ourselves up, but rather lovingly guide ourselves back to doing what is best for us. No one ever hated themselves thin. We need to love ourselves thin.. or in my case I like to use "healthy" rather than thin.

    There is also some info out there about carb cycling... kind of like keeping the body guessing. If we are off plan one day, don't go and weigh yourself the next day. Just get back on track or cut carbs a bit more for a day or two. Your body might surprise you and release some extra #'s!

  9. #9

    Join Date
    Aug 08, 2012
    Location
    Fairfax, Va
    Posts
    79

    Default Re: Its all in your head

    There's one more thing that I'd like to add. I've recently identified that I really have very little control over things in my life (children, spouse, work, etc). I like knowing that I and only I have control over what I eat. That's what I can control and I choose to every week, every day, every hour, and every minute. It's mine and nobody can take it away from me.

    Lynn
    Started my LC lifestyle in 1987 on Atkins
    Diagnosed with Hashis in 2012
    Finally starting to lose weight!
    S/C/mini goal 194/174/175 (first goal met 11-17-2012)
    168 - second goal (lowest I've ever weighed as an adult)


  10. #10

    Join Date
    Jan 27, 2012
    Location
    c-town OH
    Posts
    7,407

    Default Re: Its all in your head

    thanx jill, you are a role model for many of us


    pamela's stats
    start date 1.26.12/4.6.14
    female
    46yrs/48 yrs
    5'5"/ 5'3" <<<<--- i almost died when they told me that at the doc's
    start 274/256 restart
    down to 193/healthy and shed some poundage. i'll come up w/ a number shortly

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