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Chapter 2: Get-Real Expectations and Goals
Good morning to you! We are going to be discussing Chapter 2 this week.
There is a lot of excellent material in this Chapter, so I will be addressing some of the nuances, even though they may have been smaller in nature than some of the things you may have picked out.
As you will see, there is a lot of material in this chapter. If you don't have the book, you are missing a lot of information that is not presented here on this thread. I could type out all 19 pages, but you'd think I lost my ball in the tall weeds. If you can grab this book from the store, or online or your library for the full effect, please give it a shot. If you're still waiting for your book, I've done what I can to give a fairly well-rounded idea of what I perceive to be the most important points of discussion. Still, what I have to say isn't as important to your perception and your success as what your perception of what Dr Phil is saying to you is.
If, at any time, something catches your eye in a chapter, don't be afraid to say, "Ohmyheck! That SO speaks to me!" That's what this reading club is about. Dr Phil says so much, and different things will speak to different people.
Questions you might ask yourself based on Chapter 2:
1. How do you feel about these statements?
a) "Reality check: you can never, ever, use weight loss to solve problems that are not related to your weight. At your goal weight or not, you still have to live with yourself and deal with your problems. You will still have the same husband, the same job, the same kids, the same life."
b) "At this very moment, you may be saying to yourself that you can have any number of admirable qualities. You are a loyal friend, a caring person, someone who is smart, dependable, fun to be around. That's wonderful, and I'm happy for you, but let me ask you this: are you being any of those things to yourself?"
c) "When people go after goals, they typically confuse the means with the end. They focus on an object or an end event, such as the weight they want to reach, without ever following through to the next important step, which is identifying how being at that weight would make them feel."
d) "For one thing, are you doing it [losing weight] because your spouse, your parents, or somebody else in your life wants you to? Are you iontent on pleasing them? Because if you are, you need to rethink this whole deal.When the priorities are someone else's, and not your own, you're spending all your precious time and energy working for external approval"
e) "Yes, you have set up your world and chosen your lifestyle in a way that supports staying overweight. You have chosen to live in a way in which no other result could occur."
f) "A tried and true formula fits here: BE-DO-HAVE. BE committed, DO what it takes, and you will HAVE what you want. Don't decide to work towards your goal just for some preset period of time. You have to commit to pursuing your goals."
2. Goal Setting (Taken from the Book)
Express your goals in terms of specific behaviors and feelings.
a) With specificity, write what it is you hope to achieve (the number of pounds you want to lose or the desire to maintain your weight loss within a certain range once you have lost it).
b) Describe what you will do (the behaviors or actions you must commence, or stop, in order to lose weight).
c) When you lose weight, you want to feel (proud of your new shape, lighter, more energetic, free from obsessions over food or dieting, at peace with your body, and so forth).
Express your goal(s) in terms that can be measured and are realistic.
d) Review the goals you have written down. Now write your goals and how you plan to achieve them with specificity. Use quantifiable statements like, "I will walk brisky for 30 minutes 4 times a week", or "I will weigh 125 and I will also do this by drinking 100 ounces of water per day."
e) Assign a time-Line to your goal, thinking in terms of realism. Create your goal.
f) Break down your goal into manageable steps. Instead of saying, "I will fit into size 6 jeans at the end of summer", try, "I will take certain steps [what will they be?] to lose 2 pounds per week for the next 25 weeks. At the end of that time I will fit into size 6 jeans".
Start your entry this way: "I will take certain steps to reach my goal weight. These steps are as follows"
g) Create accountability. At least once per week, have someone to remain accountable to. Who will it be? ADBB? A spouse? A trusted friend?
Good morning to you! We are going to be discussing Chapter 2 this week.
There is a lot of excellent material in this Chapter, so I will be addressing some of the nuances, even though they may have been smaller in nature than some of the things you may have picked out.
As you will see, there is a lot of material in this chapter. If you don't have the book, you are missing a lot of information that is not presented here on this thread. I could type out all 19 pages, but you'd think I lost my ball in the tall weeds. If you can grab this book from the store, or online or your library for the full effect, please give it a shot. If you're still waiting for your book, I've done what I can to give a fairly well-rounded idea of what I perceive to be the most important points of discussion. Still, what I have to say isn't as important to your perception and your success as what your perception of what Dr Phil is saying to you is.
If, at any time, something catches your eye in a chapter, don't be afraid to say, "Ohmyheck! That SO speaks to me!" That's what this reading club is about. Dr Phil says so much, and different things will speak to different people.
Questions you might ask yourself based on Chapter 2:
1. How do you feel about these statements?
a) "Reality check: you can never, ever, use weight loss to solve problems that are not related to your weight. At your goal weight or not, you still have to live with yourself and deal with your problems. You will still have the same husband, the same job, the same kids, the same life."
b) "At this very moment, you may be saying to yourself that you can have any number of admirable qualities. You are a loyal friend, a caring person, someone who is smart, dependable, fun to be around. That's wonderful, and I'm happy for you, but let me ask you this: are you being any of those things to yourself?"
c) "When people go after goals, they typically confuse the means with the end. They focus on an object or an end event, such as the weight they want to reach, without ever following through to the next important step, which is identifying how being at that weight would make them feel."
d) "For one thing, are you doing it [losing weight] because your spouse, your parents, or somebody else in your life wants you to? Are you iontent on pleasing them? Because if you are, you need to rethink this whole deal.When the priorities are someone else's, and not your own, you're spending all your precious time and energy working for external approval"
e) "Yes, you have set up your world and chosen your lifestyle in a way that supports staying overweight. You have chosen to live in a way in which no other result could occur."
f) "A tried and true formula fits here: BE-DO-HAVE. BE committed, DO what it takes, and you will HAVE what you want. Don't decide to work towards your goal just for some preset period of time. You have to commit to pursuing your goals."
2. Goal Setting (Taken from the Book)
Express your goals in terms of specific behaviors and feelings.
a) With specificity, write what it is you hope to achieve (the number of pounds you want to lose or the desire to maintain your weight loss within a certain range once you have lost it).
b) Describe what you will do (the behaviors or actions you must commence, or stop, in order to lose weight).
c) When you lose weight, you want to feel (proud of your new shape, lighter, more energetic, free from obsessions over food or dieting, at peace with your body, and so forth).
Express your goal(s) in terms that can be measured and are realistic.
d) Review the goals you have written down. Now write your goals and how you plan to achieve them with specificity. Use quantifiable statements like, "I will walk brisky for 30 minutes 4 times a week", or "I will weigh 125 and I will also do this by drinking 100 ounces of water per day."
e) Assign a time-Line to your goal, thinking in terms of realism. Create your goal.
f) Break down your goal into manageable steps. Instead of saying, "I will fit into size 6 jeans at the end of summer", try, "I will take certain steps [what will they be?] to lose 2 pounds per week for the next 25 weeks. At the end of that time I will fit into size 6 jeans".
Start your entry this way: "I will take certain steps to reach my goal weight. These steps are as follows"
g) Create accountability. At least once per week, have someone to remain accountable to. Who will it be? ADBB? A spouse? A trusted friend?
278/275/271/160
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Thanks Cleo for posting the major items so at least I'm getting an idea of what the book is about...can't wait to actually read the book
I don't like taking all of them, but I do.
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