Coming Clean

[Charmed.Life]

Coming Clean ~ Resolve ~ New Year, New Me

Over the last few years so much has shifted and changed. I was reading some of my old blogs and was amazed in the difference in my attitude. I seemed so full of life. Now, I am so tired and depressed.

This is going to change. New Year New Me!

October 2007 to February 2008-Work is stressful, Home is hard, and relationships are not working on all fronts. Friends and I fallout. I am miserable, pissed off and tired. I am not sleeping I am depressed and the endo comes back. I gain about 20 lbs.

March 2008-We go to Florida. I am still sick. I am not sleeping. Endo is really bad. I am depressed.

April 2008-I hate winter and cannot wait for the sun. I am working out again. I start to feel better. I am still not sleeping. I spend a lot of time with other mothers at play dates.

May 2008 to June 2008 - I am feeling better. I am still not sleeping but the sun, the air and all our walks puts me at ease. I try to stay positive despite not feeling great. I reconnect with a few old friends.

July 2008-I am moving, working out, eating well and walking but not sleeping more then 5 hours a night. I am crashing and fast. I am gaining more weight despite my efforts.

August 2008-I am trying to enjoy the weather and our summer. I take control of my health. Start doing energy work, eating better, sleeping every night 8 + hours, and taking my supps, I am working out and walking.

September to November 2008 - Sucks! I have so many issues I am dealing with. Health, Relationship, my sons school, home stresses. I crash. I am at the highest weight I have ever been; pregnant or not. I avoid friends and dread going to family gatherings, I am embarrassed by how I look. I do not like this new girl I have become. I try to work out but have virtually no energy. I find that just getting through the day takes so much work. I try really hard to keep positive and maintain some sense of normalcy for my son. But inside I am miserable. I know I am sick. I am diagnosed as having hypothyroid; this explains the depression, weight gain, and sense of things falling apart. I cannot take anything to help it until I stop nursing (my son is 2 and a half years old).

December 2008 to January 2009 ~ Relationship issues are resolved in a really amazing way. I decide to stop nursing slowly over the next two months. I start cutting back carbs. I watch my diet. I sleep. I work out and walk I lose weight and about 10 inches. Endo is a bit of an issue for two weeks but I do my best to just get through it. I try to keep positive and happy over the holiday season.

What a ride! I have had some amazing blessings over the last few years. But I have also struggled with a lot of really difficulties. This year will be different. I want to learn to not take the good for granted and to not fall apart when the going gets rough. I want to find peace in my life. I want to feel happy and alive again.

My New Year, New Me Resolutions

*Lose 50 to 60 lbs (by doing Atkins, working out, doing cardio, swimming, taking supplements)
*Take time for myself (yoga, energy work, baths, meditation, sleeping, weaning Taeghan)
*Make time for my husband (date nights, reclaiming our bedroom)
*Build and maintain old and new friendships (girl nights, activities sans kids)
*Work Less (not overbook myself, only work when I have to)
*Manage Stress Better
*Be a better mother (getting out more often with Taeghan, planning more activities, less multi-tasking, being more present)
*Short Term Goals and Planning

Start Atkins Induction on Saturday January 5th and it lasts for two weeks


Workout and Cardio POA

*Weight Lifting 5 times a week
*Yoga or Chi Kung 1 time a week
*Swimming 1 time a week

Schedule

Sunday: Yoga or Chi Kung
Monday: Cardio (20 minutes) Arms
Tuesday: Cardio(20 minutes) Chest & Abs
Wednesday: Yoga or Chi Kung, Swimming
Thursday: Cardio(20 minutes) Shoulders
Friday: Cardio (20 minutes) Legs and Calves
Saturday: Cardio (20 minutes) Chest & Abs

This schedule might change depending on my life but for now this is what I am planning on doing.

[liv]

Another Canadian. That is great. I don't know what Chi Kung is. But I really like Yoga. If it would be any help to you, you can join us in the Strength challenge and log your work outs with us. Just a way to keep accountable.